What You Can Learn By Going A Month Without Porn

BY: ETHAN FIXELL

As young lads discovering the wonders of our own bodies, my friends and I were briefly obsessed with the Playboy channel on cable TV. Not that any of our parents actually subscribed to it, of course, which always left us scanning scrambled images for any semblance of a woman’s face or – pleaseGodplease – breast. This was the stuff we mentally stored as masturbatory fuel.

These days, a youngster needs only Google, the description of his dream girl and the name of a sexual position he overheard on the school bus to find an endless stream of corresponding photos and videos. To my 14-year-old self, these kids would appear to have more uncanny power than some X-Men.

With all this wondrous filth a click away, I perhaps lost some of my imagination. So I decided to cure myself from porn dependency by purging smut from my diet, the way overeaters endure cleanses to overcome sugar addictions. Thus, my plan to take a 30-day break from porn was born.

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These classic teen movies portray growing up exactly right.

BRB GONE GROCERY SHOPPING
Head on over to Guy Code Blog to read five aphrodisiac foods to serve on Valentine’s Day… and get it on.

BRB GONE GROCERY SHOPPING

Head on over to Guy Code Blog to read five aphrodisiac foods to serve on Valentine’s Day… and get it on.

The 5 best girls to rebound with:
The waitress at your favorite bar
A previous ex
A girl you meet in Vegas
One of your Tinder matches
Yourself

The 5 best girls to rebound with:

  1. The waitress at your favorite bar
  2. A previous ex
  3. A girl you meet in Vegas
  4. One of your Tinder matches
  5. Yourself
9 Signs You’re Not As Good In Bed As You Think You Are
1. You find porn very unrealistic, because girls in real life never make noise during sex.
2. You’ve ever heard the phrase, “Is it in?”
3. She tells you not to apologize; you assume she’s referring to the fart you were sure was silent.
4. You’ve changed detergents multiple times in an attempt to get rid of the allergen that is giving every girl who spends the night a headache.5. Afterward you tell her, “That was awesome.” She’s seemingly too blown away to reply.
6. While hooking up, she checks in to see how you’re liking it by asking, “Are you done yet?”
7. When you meet a girl’s friends for the first time, they tell you they’ve heard you’re really nice.
8. You send her a dirty text and she replies with a smiley face.
9. You seem to attract a lot of strong, independent women who love to insist that they “will just do it themselves.”

9 Signs You’re Not As Good In Bed As You Think You Are

1. You find porn very unrealistic, because girls in real life never make noise during sex.

2. You’ve ever heard the phrase, “Is it in?”

3. She tells you not to apologize; you assume she’s referring to the fart you were sure was silent.

4. You’ve changed detergents multiple times in an attempt to get rid of the allergen that is giving every girl who spends the night a headache.

5. Afterward you tell her, “That was awesome.” She’s seemingly too blown away to reply.

6. While hooking up, she checks in to see how you’re liking it by asking, “Are you done yet?”

7. When you meet a girl’s friends for the first time, they tell you they’ve heard you’re really nice.

8. You send her a dirty text and she replies with a smiley face.

9. You seem to attract a lot of strong, independent women who love to insist that they “will just do it themselves.”

Maybe you can write your number on the box and we can hang out?

5 Kick-Ass Alternatives To Going Home For Thanksgiving

  1. Go snowboarding
  2. Have loud sex for four days (Take advantage of your roommates being gone)
  3. Watch all of the things (Hello football and that “Die Hard” marathon)
  4. Learn how to play the guitar (Chicks dig it)
  5. Work (Make that $$$$$$$$$)

(Source: guycodeblog.mtv.com)